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Full disclosure, I’m not an Atheist, I did dabble with Atheism once when I was a young adolescent, but the devastating beauty of the world and its inherent perfection overwhelmed me whilst I was still a sensitive teenager. I remember being left awestruck by simple beauties of nature such as the sheen of sunlight on an animal’s coat, the brilliant blue shine of a crow’s feather, the endless and forever changing patterns made by white puffy clouds against infinitely blue skies typical of high summer in Wales.
It was the skies that impressed upon me most the nature of the divine, always changing and yet always remaining the same. I was for want of a better term, witnessing the unmoved mover! Wonder filled my heart and senses to the maximum as the blue skies, watched for hours on end, finally gave way to resplendent reds, oranges and purple hues that marked each sunset out as a divine gift. Once I was rewarded with a green flash despite being far from the sea. These experiences and more, made me believe that the world was the creation of divine hands, no other explanation could be possible or even credible. I believe because divinity revealed itself to me through the simple observance of nature. I was a young man, a boy of sixteen who had without realising it become a transcendentalist! God Knew me, and I yearned for an equal knowledge of God.
Other writers have reported similar sensations from their younger selves, declaring such experiences as ‘just a phase,’ that lots of people go through, making it a type of awakening I would think. Eventually one becomes inured to the presence of divinity, thus transcendence becomes mundane. I’m lucky enough to report that for me at least, it wasn’t a phase. It’s stayed with me. It’s not something that I’ve ever lost and to this day I am frequently overwhelmed by the unadulterated patterns of nature, the humble beauty of animals, the delightful reveals of sunrise and sunset, the patterns upon the waters, the hand of God is everywhere you choose to look, but you must choose. Life is beautiful because it allows for the experience of beauty, and life remains thus beautiful because all of these things are indicative of an ever-present creating spirit, a divine energy that moves the clouds, that colours the skies, that infuses all things. It’s in you, and you are in it, the created is not separate to the creator. One is the subject, the other is the object, both are needed in order for an experience to take place and that’s what life is. It’s a place where you get to experience the divine and in return the divine experiences you.
It’s not what Nietzsche intended when he famously stated that should you look into an abyss for long enough the abyss would eventually return the favour and look into you. The abyss that I gazed into was at once infinitely loving, peaceful, dazzling, friendly, brilliant and awe inspiring. Its gentlest touch forgave all transgressions without hesitation and without judgement, making the impure once again pure. The briefest contact with this nexus of God elated the soul and filled the heart with peace. The abyss was a rich, frothing and at once tranquil infinity filled with paradox, illusion, light, truth, as well as the capacity for endless creation.
When you create, you cannot help but destroy, and you are born to create, so make it beautiful, make it good, demand the best of yourself, replace ugliness in the world with beauty, starting with yourself, create yourself anew, discard the bad, replace it with good, make this unceasing process your life’s work, and in doing so you will please God, and co-create a better world for all. That’s why you are here! Your task in this life and possibly in the next is to make things better. So go ahead and be better, starting with yourself, right here, right now, and in the present…
“In the midst of a gentle rain while these thoughts prevailed, I was suddenly sensible of such sweet and beneficent society in Nature, in the very pattering of the drops, and in every sound and sight around my house, an infinite and unaccountable friendliness all at once like an atmosphere sustaining me, as made the fancied advantages of human neighborhood insignificant, and I have never thought of them since.” – Henry David Thoreau
